Monday, November 18, 2013

Truth Stranger than Fiction

The stuff going on at work that I can't talk much about is still happening.  If anything, it has intensified.  My life is like a Dan Brown novel.  A nice little narrative, with a compelling protagonist.  Some friends become enemies, and enemies become friends.

But seriously, these are things that are actually happening in my life right now:

  • A Russian billionaire, rumoured to have ex-KGB bodyguards.
  • Corrupt lawyers and accountants.
  • Lawsuits, and threatened counter-suits, and threatened counter-counter-suits.
  • Meetings being recorded on audio-tape for the record, because no one's word (or memory) can be trusted anymore.
  • Top secret information.
  • Friends actually becoming enemies, and enemies becoming, if not friends, at least allies.
  • Unexpected plot twists, sometimes more than one per day.
  • Arson.  (Not directly in my office, but in the business next door.  No one was hurt. Our suite was filled with stinky smoke and we had to be professionally decontaminated.  Probably unrelated to all the other stuff that's going on, but a nice touch, don't you think?  Definitely the cherry on the cake of my week.)
In short, all the stuff that you read about or watch in thrillers, depending on whether you're a movie or a book person, is all actually happening in my life.  Short of actual murder, kidnapping, and explosions, it's all there.  Every stupid plot point that I used to roll my eyes at and say "That would never happen in real life" is happening in my real life.

In closing, I present to you the lame joke that I've recited to everyone at work, because what else is there to say?  "We've had floods here, and now a fire.  What's next?  A volcano?  Or Godizilla ripping the roof off?"


DarcKnyt said...

Oooh, Godzilla would be sort of cool. I mean, if no one got hurt during the roof ripping.

And how 'bout that action and intrigue? You're a regular Ms. Peel. Very exciting!

wigsf3 said...

Nah. Next thing to happen will involve Rob Ford. Trust me.

Warped Mind of Ron said...

Just watch for Tom Cruise to be lowered from the roof to hack your computers... it could happen. Hope life settles down in a good way for you soon, unless you like the excitement ;-)

G. B. Miller said...

Your blog post title reminds of a song by Bad Religion of the same name. Nonsensical and cryptically funny at the same time.

I would say that it can't get any worse, but after reading your post, that would be saying an untruth.

In any event, I'll leave a quote from the original version of "Total Recall": Please fasten your safety belt.

Granny Annie said...

And you are keeping notes on all this for a future novel aren't you?

LL Cool Joe said...

Wow, sounds like fun. Not. I hope all this isn't giving you sleepless nights?

Sparkling Red said...

DarcKnyt: I do feel rather glamorous, when things are looking up.

WIGSF: Fordzilla, d'you think?

Ronnie: That would be cool. Tom Cruise would be better than Godzilla, OR Fordzilla.

G. B.: Yeah, don't say that too loudly. Anything that CAN happen WILL happen, in this place.

Granny Annie: But then I'd have to kill anyone who read it because it's so top secret!

Joey: Amazingly, I'm sleeping pretty well. I must be jaded from living with drama so much of the time.

Lynn said...

Golly - hang in there!

Vanessa T said...

Goodness! So much drama! I hope things calm down for you soon. No one needs that much stress.