Thursday, February 4, 2010

Slug Flu

It's a relief to be back at work. Seriously. On Saturday an invisible, energy-sucking slug attached itself to my forehead, and stayed there for five days. That son-of-a-gun was hungry. Just when I was wondering if I'd ever feel normal again, it decided it had had its fill. It warped back to the energy-sucking slug dimension where it lives with all of its horrible, squooshy brothers and sisters. Yuck.

When I'm off work for more than two days, I start to miss the stimulating environment. I'm used to talking to lots of different people, and solving problems all day. It doesn't take long for me to get bored, lying around at home. I need to be mentally challenged. (Some might argue that I've been mentally challenged since birth, but that's another story.)

I have an odd way of getting sick. These days, more often than not, when I catch a virus, I don't get the typical symptoms associated with being sick. My nose doesn't run; my throat doesn't hurt; my digestive tract doesn't eject its contents. I just get tired. Big time tired. My heart rate speeds up, and if I over-exert myself I feel faint. And my body temperature goes up, sometimes to an official "fever" level, but more often just below that.

Sometimes I think this is a sign that I'm in good health. All the vitamins I take are a great investment. If I didn't take them I'm sure I'd be much worse off. I might get sick, but at least I'm very comfortable while I lie around being useless.

On the other hand, sometimes I think that because I don't have well-defined symptoms, it must all be in my head. I'm a hypochondriac. I'm psychosomatic. I've broken down under stress, and I'm wallowing. If I could just force myself to get up and get moving, I'd be perfectly fine.

When I'm thinking like that, sometimes I make the mistake of going to work while I'm still sick. Like on Tuesday, when I dragged my sorry butt in to sit through an important management meeting. I'm sure I looked very professional huddling in my chair, using my parka as a blanket, struggling to keep my eyelids up. One of my bosses, the less sentimental one, offered to swap seats with me so that I could sit near the heater. I was touched by his concern (but too lazy to get up and switch chairs). By the end of that meeting, when I got up to walk back to my office, I thought that I might pass out.

I need to take myself more seriously. Turns out there are viruses floating around that cause fever and fatigue without other symptoms. One of my colleagues spent the weekend suffering from the same sickness. I'd be willing to bet that I caught that nasty slug-flu from her. Which means that it was real. (Either that, or we're both psychosomatic.)

So look out for the intergallactic invisible slug-beasts. I can't really advise you on how to protect yourselves, but you might want to keep some salt handy.


Anonymous said...

Let Dr. WIGSF take care of you.

All slugs can be stopped with salt. Plain run of the mill table salt.

I prescribe french fries, chicken nuggets, or pretty well anything at McDonalds.

DarcsFalcon said...

So sorry you've been under the weather hon. I know stress plays such a huge factor in getting sick too, and you've had some stressful months recently. Here's hoping that all sickness is behind you now and that you can move forward in lots of good health. :) I'll be praying.

LL Cool Joe said...

Sounds like you've been ill quite a bit recently, so you look after yourself.

My older daughter is being an energy-sucking slug at the moment. Sometimes I wish she was invisible, or me.

Warped Mind of Ron said...

OMG! I should have realized it! Energy sucking slugs... It makes perfect sense now... {Yawn} I'll destroy them... {Yawn} with salt... right after this nap...

Anonymous said...

I hope you're back to 100% soon, sweetie. It's no fun at all being sick.

We'll say a prayer for you. :)

Ily said...

I was sick for two weeks and like you, the symptoms weren't severe but I lost a lot of energy (and common sense). I definitely push myself too hard and end up paying for it later.

I, too, get cabin fever when I'm home for more than a day or two. What's up with that??

Feel better, my friend! ((Hugs))

Mone said...

I'm glad you feel better already.

Sparkling Red said...

wigsf: If I have a prescription, are my fries covered by my third-party insurance plan? What about the ketchup?

DarcsFalcon: Thank you! I need every prayer. The toughest stress still lies ahead, of that I'm sure.

LL Cool Joe: Sometimes the energy-sucking slugs take on human form in order to embark upon a life-long career of parisitism. They can be easily identified by their draining effect.

Ron: Well, it was nice knowing you.

darcknyt: Thanks! I'm almost back to full health. A quiet weekend is coming up, so I can laze around some more, whether I need to or not. :-)

Ily: It's hard to know how much is too much activity when you're feeling under the weather. I'm never sure whether I should rest more or try to change gears and push through it. Sometimes pushing through works out OK, and sometimes it's a huge mistake.

Mone: Thanks!

powdergirl said...

Nope, not salt. Get some amino acids into your system. Weider product, BCAA, is inexpensive and a good source : )

Sounds like you're running your system down a bit, you've been sick a lot for fairly short periods of time. Unless you're just going for the sympathy here? Haha.

The Amino's might toughen you up a little bit, they've been working for me since I had a pretty rough Nov/ Dec/Jan, with antibiotics and abcesses and bloody awful root canals. And they work fast, too.

Just a thought : )

Jenski, PhD said...

Blech! Hope you're feeling back to normal by now. I really don't like that weak feeling when you wish you could do normal stuff or feel like you should have MORE symptoms and feel more crappy to validate your illness. :-)

Sparkling Red said...

Powdergirl: Amino acids eh? Isn't that what proteins are made of? So if I have some ham and eggs, or a burger, would that do the trick?

Jenski: That's exactly it! I hate being too under-the-weather to accomplish anything, but not sick enough to be Sick.