Tuesday, December 4, 2007

This is not an advertorial

I really love my contact lenses. This is a story which illustrates two points:

1) Acuvue Oasys lenses really are the shizzle, and;

2) sometimes I get confused.

I was at my eye doctor's last July, trying on contact lenses for the first time since 1988. Who remembers contact lenses from the 1980's? What a pain in the rear they were. All that fiddling with different bottles of solution and protein dissolving tablets. I couldn't deal with the hassle. But things have changed!

The doctor gives me a pair of lenses to try on. No problem. I'm cool. I've done this before. I carefully apply lens to eyeball, and repeat. The woman sitting beside me at the mirror is having trouble getting hers in. She's all admiring-like, jealous of my ability to stick my finger in my eye without flinching. I pretend to be bashful, but of course I'm feeling smug.

The doctor comes by to check up on me. How are the lenses? Oh, well, actually, now that you mention it, my vision is still very blurry. That's confusing. I swear I put them both in, but I can't feel them. Could I have dropped one? Or both? How could I have lost them both? The doctor takes me back to the examining room and peers into my eyes with his special magnifying light. Ah, he says.

Your vision is blurred because you put both lenses in the same eye. On top of each other.

Wow. Who's smug now?

I feel like such a dope.

And also, I'm impressed. These contact lenses are so comfortable that I can layer two in one eye and not even feel them! Nice! A definite improvement over 1988.


R.E.H. said...

LOL! That was funny. Two lenses in one eye... double vision?

I've always felt lucky to have good eyesight. I could never wear contact lenses - I not only flinch, but start to panic when a finger nears my eye.

jameil1922 said...

lmao @ On top of each other!! wow...

kate said...

Now that is a good one ...

Sparkling Red said...

Speaking of double vision, I have also put my glasses on accidentally while I'm still wearing my contact lenses. However, I defend my intelligence by stating that I have never put two socks on the same foot, or put my socks on overtop of my shoes. Yet.