Tuesday, March 4, 2008

Aging Ungracefully

I always swore that I wouldn't fight the aging process. I was under the illusion that I could accept it gracefully. Why did I think that I would be exempt from the feelings that everyone goes through?

Some things are easy to disguise. A few silver hairs disappear with the help of artificial colour. Teeth can be whitened. Spider veins can be covered up. (I no longer reveal my legs above mid-calf.)

But there's a slight crinkliness around my eyes now that can't be hidden. My whole face is starting to change. I'm not a believer in unnecessary surgery or over-priced cosmetics, so I'm going to have to get used to it. I'm crossing the threshold into middle age.

It's my goal to have my shit totally together by the time I'm 40. There's a certain kind of woman I admire, who has a few lines in her face, who has put up with enough nonsense in her life and is no longer willing to submit. She has a solid core of self-assurance. She doesn't indulge in girlish drama. That's who I want to be.

I'm getting there. A few more years and a few more laugh lines...

How accepting are you of your aging process? Have you had to face it yet?

22 comments:

Aurora said...

I'm not very accepting of my own age. I'm definitely a sucker for expensive eye cream. But it's better than being young and awkward. Also, you have lots of shit together so, congrats!

unsigned said...

I've never been the right age for anything so I can't say life has ever changed for me.

Leighann said...

Why bother to get my hair highlighted when I have natural gray highlights??!!

Warped Mind of Ron said...

I would color my hair if I had enough to justify coloring. God I'm old!

jameil1922 said...

only 25 but i like you have illusions about how i will accept it... i think gray hair is hot, tho. i really like it on men. ooh la la!! but i have no desire to date anyone more than 5 years older than me.

Sparkling Red said...

Aurora: Thanks! Let me know if the eye cream works. I might buy some if I believed that it would actually do anything. I'm such a skeptic. ;-)

Unsigned: That's a mixed blessing. I guess you don't have anything to lose by aging. You are unusual!

Leighann: True enough! Some folks really rock their silver streaks.

Warped Mind of Ron: Maybe this is an opportunity to start a wardrobe of awesome hats. Suggestions to get you started: A three-cornered pirate hat. A chef's hat. A fireman's hat. A tiara. ;-)

Jameil: Grey hair, when well-groomed on a person who takes care of themselves, is attractive to me because it says "I am so confident that I don't need to colour my hair. I know I'm cool exactly as I am." Works for men and women.

whatigotsofar said...

I don't age. And it's not because of some weird deal I made with the Devil or anything like that. I just regularly have blood transfusions using only the blood from younger people.

R.E.H. said...

Growing old is not fun... jeez, I can't even believe I just wrote that and meant it!

Well, as for the gray hair, I guess I can live with that... it is the loss of energy that beats me up. And, the fact that I hate hearing younger people calling me old!

Keera Ann Fox said...

I'm 47 but since Mother Nature has blessed me with oily skin, my face isn't showing much of my age. Hair's mainly all one color still, too. Does help to not do things like smoke or tan or yo-yo diet.

Here's my take on why life begins at 40: You spend the first 20 years of your life having a childhood, and the next 20 trying to sort out said childhood. Hitting 40 feels very liberating.

1218Blog said...

I think I am starting to accept my aging process a little more everyday. I think the thing that bothers me most is not the grays or the laugh lines but the time it takes me to lose that piece of cake I ate. I used to be able to eat anything and just go to the gym and burn it off. Now it seems like it is a constant uphill battle.

Sparkling Red said...

WhatIgotsofar: Good solution. Do you bleed the kids dry or just take a little from each one?

R.E.H.: Yeah, I do notice a decline in my energy since my 20's. This old lady needs to get to bed on time or she's cranky in the morning! So far I haven't been called "old" to my face. I'm sure I'll have my turn eventually.

Keera: I'm actually looking forward to 40. Good for you for keeping your youthfulness! It is to be enjoyed.

1218blog: That's the one thing that I haven't had to deal with. I'm really lucky. My size hasn't changed since I reached adulthood. Thanks, Mom, for passing your wicked fast metabolism on to me! It must be really frustrating to have to deal with weight gain.

moo said...

I always said that I wouldn't freak out about aging. I have, after all, a young outlook and a baby face.

But I see sun spots and *gasp!* is that a new freckle on my chin! I did NOT sign up for that when I said aging gracefully was OK.

I'll just have to hold onto my young outlook, since my baby face is going down the tubes.

Jenski said...

I'm only in my late 20s and I've been putting eye cream on for years. A lot of people think I am younger than I really am. I had a rough time with my first grays though!

whatigotsofar said...

I got a really big Cuisinart.

Sparkling Red said...

Moo: I know what you mean. I had a baby face for 34 years, and it's hard to say goodbye to it. As recently as last summer, a friend of my 22-year-old sister assumed that I was still living at home with my parents as a new college student. I started to believe that I could look 21 forever.

Jenski: You have a very youthful face, in your photos. It's partly because of your charming, uninhibited smile. :-)

WhatIgotsofar: Gross!

Nicole said...

I'm 35 now, turning 36 at the end of the year.
So far I'm taking it easy n aging.
The grey hairs are covered now with Henna most of the time.
My legs are alright, not overly lined yet.
The rest of my body is still ok, but I feel the aging.
So far t doesn't bug me too much.
It might help that hubby is 11 years older and I still am sort of his little girl ;)

PixieVonAzia said...

When my mom was in her 50's she never looked her age. She had great skin and a few wrinkles around her eyes when she smiled. I'm hoping that I inherited that from her along with other things =)

Tookie Tail said...

Just wait till you hit 50 and then we'll talk about the aging process! That's when it all hit home for me! lol

My 81 year old Mom tells me I'm not handling the aging process very well. I hope I take after the female side of my family and not show my age!

I feel young inside! Not sure who that woman is looking at me in the mirror though!

Sparkling Red said...

Nicole: For sure, there's nothing to make you feel young like being around someone who's older. I always feel like a little baby after I've been to visit my grandparents. It's all relative...
;-)

Pixie Von Azia: Good for your Mom! I hope you inherited her robust DNA. My parents both look younger than their age - always a good sign of things to come.

Tookie Tail: For real! I know that this is just the beginning, and when I'm 45 or 55 or 65 I'll look back each time at my appearance ten years before, and wonder what the heck I was complaining about. ;-)

Thomas said...

I think I am doing okay. I could head to the gym a little more.

San said...

At 54, I'm definitely facing the aging process. It's written all over my face.

Horrors.

Sparkling Red said...

Thomas: I think most of us could do with a little more time at the gym. ;-)

San: We must all walk the path, and it doesn't get any easier no matter how many have gone before. I have a friend who wishes to die young and attractive, in a tragic accident. I'd rather stick it out, even when the mirror starts to get a little unnerving.